….. naked selfie, and then followed it up with an essay, defending her right to post naked selfies, on her website after a mixed reaction from various celebs on social media.  And rightly so.

Now, Kim sweetie, there’s no disputing you have a bloody IN-CRED-IBLE (natural or not) body, {insert applause here}.  AND, there is absolutely no doubt at all, at all, at all, that you are, like, totally owning your own sexuality.  Bravo, {insert more applause here}.  The issue is, for me – and I can only speak for myself – that it’s quite simply getting tedious.  And honestly, in response to Bette Midler’s comment, it would not surprise (or interest) me, if you stuck a camera up your fou, and posted that.  She actually said stick it down the other end, but let’s not split hairs.

What does bother me a tad, is as Chloë Grace Moretz said: Kim K’s position as a role-model, and in that, her responsibility to send positive messages to those who follow her religiously.  Namely, young women.  It is positive, to celebrate our bodies, of course it is – but we don’t all look like you Kimmie.  Do we?  I quite like my body, but no-one needs to see it on social media.  How about posting a picture of yourself covered in spot cream, or grabbing a handful of cellulite and posting that?  I’m Kim Kardashian and even I, with all my treatments and potions and lotions and plumps and tucks, am not perfect.  Girls (and boys actually) need to see a more realistic representation of beauty, that’s achievable down the high street, and in a house where your siblings are running amok and your mother’s screaming that tea is ready and you’ve got homework to do.  And it doesn’t make you a million dollars.

a truly inspirational woman

Yes, I also applaud the fact you’re a multi-millionaire.  Congratulations.  But how?  Coming from a fairly comfortable background, giving you the opportunity to own a designer boutique in Hollywood, partying, being Paris Hilton’s bestie, having a sex-tape, a couple of failed marriages, partying and spawning Kanye West’s offspring.  It’s all tits, money, money, money, sex, tits and more material possessions.  All achieved by getting your baps out.  Little else.   You are the one percent Kim, and your followers are the ninety-nine percent.  It’s completely unrealistic.

It’s like the boy who cried wolf, only the wolf is ‘Kim K has done something new and interesting!’, when actually, you haven’t.  You’re just naked. Again. *stifles yawn.  Ms Midler’s right, what’s left?  What have you got in your arsenal Kim, for when gravity takes over, you’re in your fifties and quite frankly, the most painful realisation of all; that chronic boredom has set in and no-one actually gives two hoots any more?  Because it will happen, such is the fickle world of celebrity.  And despite the money you’ve accrued, you’ll be sad, because it’s actually those little hearts and thumbs-up that fuel you.  You won’t be ‘relevant’ anymore.  

It’s important to have pride in your appearance (and can I emphasise, whatever shape you are), and not feel ashamed of being naked…… But, it’s also desperately important to emphasise that, if you don’t have the perfect curves and the gifted exposure of the shoulders you happen to rub with, to help you on your way, you need a water-tight plan B.  And C.  And D.  What’s yours Ms K-West?

So, here’s a tip; if you really, desperately want to ‘break the Internet’, (which in itself is a bit of a weird ambition to have), set up a charitable foundation for young women from war-torn countries, to help them with their literacy skills.  Or even for the kids on your own doorstep, from the poorer outreaches of your gilded world.

And truly surprise us all.