Shit is getting real. Theresa May is holding an away day at Chequers to nail down her proposal for the Withdrawal Bill to the EU, today. Boris will be there. Boris, the one who said, “fuck business”. You know him. David Davis will be there, the Brexit chief negotiator who has only spent four hours negotiating. You know him. Going on the progress of the last two years – I expect literally nothing will be achieved.
Bonkers Brexit breakdown (With alliteration like this, I could have had a career as a sub-editor on any number of tabloids):
Jacob Rees-Mogg has moved a part of his investment business to Dublin to avoid the consequences of Brexit, whilst all the while continuing to extoll its virtues to the man on the street. Who keep buying it. Speculation is rife that Farage tanked the pound with his premature announcement that Remain had won, thus benefiting speculators, who coincidentally were his associates. A photo that emerged of him laughing and pointing at a screen indicating the sterling crash at more or less three thirty in the morning after the vote, does nothing to discredit this claim. Nigel Lawson had applied for French citizenship, Farage, German. John Redwood, a leading Brexiter, first threatened businesses to keep their mouths shut else there be severe consequences in the form of cutting Government support, then encouraged investors to take their money out of the UK and put it elsewhere. Lord Ashcroft has suggested British businesses head to Malta to avoid the economic fallout of leaving the Union.
But, but, I thought Britain was going to be a thriving place for investment post Brexit……. No? Remind me again – why are we leaving?
An investigation by the Electoral Commission found that Vote Leave broke the law, along with Leave EU, headed up by Arron Banks, which was also found to have broken the law. I repeat: THE LAW WAS BROKEN. And the UK is haemorrhaging leading industry investors at a rate of knots. But you know – tally ho! Over the cliff edge we go.
Donald Trump’s visit to the UK in the next couple of weeks, is going ahead despite his racism, xenophobia, homophobia, misogyny and baby cages; and his just general disgusting human beingness. He’ll be rewarded with a meeting with the Queen, for his troubles. I wonder what she thinks of it all. One can assume she watches the news.
Most notably, there have been absolutely. no. consequences. for any of the above. Nothing. NADA. So it would appear that bollocks, lies, fuckwittery and bullshit are rewarded.
With this new world order in place, where the arsehole takes it all (a fresh take on an ABBA classic), I’ve decided to go on the rampage. Who’s with me? I’m thinking bank robbery, grand theft auto, tax avoidance, spot of fraud and maybe a new plot to topple Parliament. Oh wait, what’s the point of that; it voted away its own power during the ‘final say’ vote….. so much for the ‘fight for sovereignty’. Irony is dead. Okay, well all the other stuff. There are no rules anymore and no accountability. I’m going to start small and work my way up.
First on the list is to start using a gym I don’t pay for and shout ‘BREXIT!‘ in the faces of the staff when they try to evict me. I’m going to order cake in restaurants and cafes and bakeries and not pay for it. Then shout ‘BREXIT!’ as I run away shovelling it into my face. I’m going to sneak into the zoo over/under a fence, then shout, ‘WHERE ARE THE FUCKING UNICORNS? I WANT UNICORNS!‘ and then ‘BREXIIIIIIT!‘ as I’m dragged out kicking and screaming. I’m not going to pay any tax and when the tax office call me up, holler ‘OFFSHORE‘ and then ‘BREXIT!’ I may also wave a tiny Union Flag, just to hammer the point home that I am in fact British, God damn it, and I can quite literally do what the hell I like; and you can too.
The goons in charge of this illegal debacle, and Trump, have changed the rule book forever and anything is fair game. We can all do what the hell we want……… right?
Somehow, I suspect we’d all be hauled into the slammer faster than you could murmur, ‘I didn’t really want the cake and I was only joking about the unicorns’. Anyway, for you, and only you, I’m going to give the idea a little run out, see what happens and get back to you. It might just save you a lot of embarrassment. I’m willing to do that.
Don’t say I never give you anything….
p.s. I am still mightily pissed off that we’re going to lose our EU rights and freedoms for this utter shower of shit. Just in case you weren’t completely convinced of that.