Champagne cocktails, Venetian masks, Porches, Jaguars, diamonds and fine art. A fake priest trying to recruit new blood to a his prostitution ring – possibly, two potential new clients, one from Russia, club guestlist from a mobile millionaire Hugh Grant-alike from Fitzrovia and an invitation to a weekend inFrankfurt from a very attractive (but married) […]
A spontaneous invitation to Excellence Life, means a quick wardrobe decisión after work and fool-proof make-up make-over. Killer dress – check Killer heels – check Smokey eyes – check Clutch full of business cards – check Who says teaching English can’t be a luxury product?? I’ll come away with one new client. done deal.
That is all.
I get served beautiful chocolate orange, Christmas tea infusión, with real life gold in it……. I feel valuable. It was so beautiful I didn’t want to drink it.
(or inately stupid). Justin Bieber, just because you have a big tattoo of me on your calf does not mean your recent behaviour is forgiven. I like this particular representation of myself, it just so happens, Ecce Homo by Rubens from 1610, and I am very flattered you wanted my face on your person. But; you and […]
and so, I have had a day completely off from everything. Really. Done. Nothing. That is all.
Saturday, 22/02/2014 19:00 hours – arrive gymnasium (closes at 19:30 hours. Was not aware of that fact). 19:30 hours – leave gymnasium. Sheepishly. 19:45 hours – arrive supermarket 19:55 hours – leave supermarket with yet more pasta, pesto and red wine. 20:00 hours – shower, while downloading Hunger Games II 20:10 hours – unload washing […]
I forced myself to the gym last night to kick-start, ‘operation lift funk’. And I have to say, with the help of the man-mountain next to me who was competing with five foot, fiddy-fi kilo me*, I managed to finally begin the arduous process of dragging my sad and sorry, gym-less, pyjama-wearing, wine-coiffing, spaghetti-laden arse out of the […]
Don’t eat purple spring onions if your job involves being within a 10kilometre radius of other human beings. They’re like the H-bomb of vegetables. NOT ideal for close proximity one-to-one classes, I just took out half of the Eixample just walking down the street. I may be accountable for a couple of deaths by asphyxiation […]
If you go to the doctor to discuss The Funk, without really knowing what exactly it is that you’ve got, but you just feel bad and weird and you say, “Doctor, I feel bad and weird and don’t want to paint my toe-nails a pretty colour”, he/she will tell you to take a seat and […]
The Secret Diary of Anne Pank 