For my nieces and nephews 

Well, what a year this has been, and it’s not over yet.  The election result in the USA last week was for me, the sledgehammer blow of realisation; we are not progressing. Right now humanity is hopeless. And to my nieces and nephews I say: sorry. I thought we were better than this.  I thought […]

Open letter to the USA

Ms Anne Pank some dark, gothic street Barcelona Dear United States of America, I hope you don’t mind me getting in touch with you like this, but the desire was too strong to ignore. Tomorrow is D-Day.  Don’t f*ck it up. I do apologise, let me rephrase that.  Failing President Obama – knowledgeable, elegant, diplomatic, […]

Reasons why I don’t have kids #57

Halloween pressure!   The most fun I ever had at Halloween, was the year I decided to fully embrace it when I was living in my house in Liverpool.  I decorated my window at the front  with fairy-lit twigs that I already had in my lounge, dressed from head to toe in suitably gothy, black […]

Men without children, same as women without children shocker

Incapable of feeling or rational thought? What a furore!  Things have been so very dull of late in politics (what with no fascist rhetoric whatsoever coming from Blighty, or chat of jam and air and child-labour saving the Brit economy), a drama was long overdue. Well, it had been a whole week since the Labour […]

Returning to the Shires

I’m almost tempted to get knocked up and go home!  No, really!  (rusty tubes permitting, obviously), such is the idyllic view of future Blighty currently being painted by the government during their party conference in Birmingham.  What a beautiful place it’s going to be and a cracking future for kids.  No? At the weekend, The Telegraph published […]

The Great British Bunyol Fight 

We’ve finally lost our collective minds it would appear. Well, we kind of knew this already to be fair, 2016 has seen some sort of epic global meltdown.  Look long and hard at Brexit (believing words that came out of the bumbling, ridiculous mouths of Farage and Johnson, and changing the state of a nation […]

Reasons why I don’t have kids #55

Some people say to me, often I just realised, “You’re a bit pessimistic/negative”. What I might have said to elicit that response, is something along the lines of 1. “Jesus H. Christ my knees hurts.  *Age is a big ol’ bitch!” OR 2. “Jesus H. Christ, Monday again, what a c*nt!”, OR 3. “JEHEE-EE-Sus Holy Mother […]

Female politician with no kids?? *Narrows eyes*

Another day, another article drawing attention to women without children who appear to be simply getting on with life.  These particular women however, just happen to be getting on with life in public office. This weekend, The Sunday Times ‘tantalised‘ us with a secret about Nicola Sturgeon, Scotland’s First Minister.  ‘OOOOOooohhhhh’ thought my inner Kenneth Williams.  I […]

Summertime, and the livin’ is easy

Ah August, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways…… Exercise, creativity, reading the shit out of stuff, taking better care of myself, a two month health kick.  You know the drill.  So filled with dizzying enthusiasm for a productivity-packed summer vacation was I (again) that I almost completely forgot that I am, in […]

Reasons why I don’t have kids #54

The beach.  I have five different levels of SPF, to ensure an even tan.  And to gradually reduce the strength as the summer progresses.  I have a two litre bottle of water, frozen in the freezer overnight so that it stays cold for the maximum time. No-one likes drinking bath temperature water.  I have a […]