For the love of sweet baby Jesus

What is with this heat? It’s not time….. Water is pouring out of every part of my body. What is happening? Why aren’t I smaller? Why this is hell, nor are am out of it….. I’m a bit hot. Scorching temperatures have arrived (it’s already 36 degrees) and are expected to increase in a freaky […]

I never, EVER want to go to the gym with my boyfriend

It’s where I sweat profusely because I’m working my t*tties off to try and stay in some kind of aceptable human shape and improve my stamina, so I don’t die walking up the stairs when the lift is out of order in my building.  (Which actually happened after I got back from Christmas).  It’s a biological FACT, […]

The latest beauty b*llsh*t

So I’ve made an appointment to have my knee-caps shaved because they’re a bit too prominent and they’re ruining the aesthetic of my legs.  Honestly, what’s a girl to with these impractical, protruding bones? And thinking of impractical protruding bones, I think my ankles are not quite in the right place so in the summer, […]