…….But with MaryPaz shoes, Carrie’s let herself go and gained two stone, no pop-up gallery openings and ‘Mr Vanilla‘ not ‘Mr Big’. Although I have dropped my bag (condoms an’ all), in public and worn a tiara, that’s probably where the similarity ends…. Every so often, the mist clears from my eyes, and I see […]
So, I fell off the Tinder wagon, after claiming I was going dating ‘organic’, at the same time I hopped right back on the booze bus, after (Dry January and a half). Still – more or less – sugarfree; I should be thankful for small, self-control mercies I suppose. I also bought a month on […]
I turned forty-five at the weekend, and it was all I could do, to keep the ball of abject terror down, and not run through the streets screaming like a banshee, “I’m not ready!! I need more time!” I was seriously close to a real-life, bona fide panic attack. The Ten Commandments of Adult Life […]
For me, HAPPINESS is: Being alive and being healthy. Appreciate it. Every. Single. Day. Love – this is not the exclusive reserve of couples. Love yourself (a lot, if the mood takes you. Err hheerrm), breathing, fruit, creatures – except the likes of snakes/cockroaches/earworms/penis-burrowing fish, and their ilk (that’ll get you nowhere). Your world, your city, […]
Firstly, I am writing this with a bottle of Moet open, accompanied by a meticulously planned dream breakfast of freshly squeezed orange juice, coffee and a toasted bagel, smeared with cream cheese and topped with smoked salmon, a squeeze of lemon and a sprinkle of black pepper. I feel like I’m on death row, […]
….. naked selfie, and then followed it up with an essay, defending her right to post naked selfies, on her website after a mixed reaction from various celebs on social media. And rightly so. Now, Kim sweetie, there’s no disputing you have a bloody IN-CRED-IBLE (natural or not) body, {insert applause here}. AND, there is […]
And so it rolls around again, and some of the men will get all upset that there’s a day for us poor, hysterical folk possessing of boobs and vaginas. That we feel there’s a necessity to implement an International Women’s Day concerns them. “But WHY?” we hear them wail in unison. And it’s a good question. Because, […]
Happy Mother’s Day. To the mothers I know, and the ones I don’t, you are wonderful, ethereal creatures. My own mum will turn seventy in October of this year; and I have never valued what she is and what she does, more than I do now that I am older. With each passing year, I […]
WWhhoopp!! Oh Amsterdam how do I love thee, let me count the ways….. It’s been more than twenty years since I was in you. I went with my ex-husband and we stayed with friends, and I never saw the canals or the museums or the red-light district. We never made it there, because my […]
I do believe I’ve lost the will to drink. No. Really….. After my first foray into the darker side of life (the pub with mates to watch the inaugural match of the Six Nations tournament), after five weeks on the wagon, I realised: I can’t do it, I don’t like it, and it most definitely […]
The Secret Diary of Anne Pank 