I’ve always loved this time of year the most: the smells, the colours, the pleasure of digging out your knitwear and boots. Less so here, as it’s still twenty-three degrees – but you get the idea. It’s always felt like a new leaf turning over, more so than Spring for me. I like the idea […]
I’ve fallen in love with my therapist! It was inevitable (so I’ve been led to believe), but I didn’t expect it to happen quite so quickly. I’ve had one session……. Okay, so I’m not really in love. But you know, I could be. All things considered (all in fact being one thing, and that one thing […]
…….and I can’t believe there’s already Christmas food on sale in Selfridges. August flew by in a flurry of visitors, who came and went in shifts, that allowed me to perform a one day change-over in the manner of a top flight hotel. A top flight hotel that resides in possibly the pissiest street […]
On the way back from the beach yesterday, after meeting another group of the the other half’s friends, and after hearing that after peace-keeping mission #2 – a night at the theatre – number one announced that she ‘would never accept’ another woman in her father’s life; the penny finally dropped: there was someone in […]
Because apparently, these days it’s not ok to say no to kids, because they ‘get sad’. Well, you know what junior, y’all betta man up, coz that’s the way the world works….. (uum sorry, I don’t know what came over me. Oh wait, yes I do – non-motherness). They say you’re never too old to […]
Walking around Port Aventura on a fortuitous day off, last Tuesday, I was struck by a new found appreciation for my mother’s necessity for coffee breaks every hour on the hour, whenever we went on a trip or day out when I was a kid. Whilst I wholeheartedly wanted to be buffeted around at 1000 […]
Sunshine and heat = kids just want to run around and have fun. And also: I don’t….. My go-to hot weather strategy is to naked starfish in front of a fan, at every available opportunity. I’d probably teach like this, if it was acceptable. But for very obvious reasons, it’s not. Poor students. It does […]
One day they could walk through the door, after a long day at school and say, “f*ck this sh*t mum, studying is for losers. I want to take the UK all the way at the Eurovision Song Contest!” “I’m going to have a giant pineapple on stage that I’ll crawl out of and start […]
Well…… I’ll be. Even I haven’t been able to act the clown I usually am, and make funnies these last few (very significant) months. This has proven a problem for someone who mostly writes about nonsense and shenanigans – oh, and not being a mother. (Which for me, are in fact intrinsically linked). The world’s […]
Here I stand, proud possessor of boobs, saluting all great women everywhere. Past and present. (Pssssst, just for the record, I also admire great men too, before y’all start freaking out. It’s just that today is International Women’s Day, and that’s what I’m talking about). How quickly time flies when you’re still fighting the good […]
The Secret Diary of Anne Pank 