That moment when you’re in the supermarket queue with your deliciously satisfying non-alcoholic beer, ‘Friday night is treat night’, large ham and mozzarella pizza (for one) and all the extra trimmings: salami, olives, cheese, mushrooms, etc. etc. because there’s just not quite enough lard on there and that MoFo ain’t gonna pimp itself, no siree; […]
…… but I’m beginning to think that alcohol is actually the glue that was holding this ol’ body together!! It’s almost ten days into Dry January and my face is falling off in great big lumps of dry skin (little flakey patches actually), and I’m more than a little certain that that extra three kilos […]
You will mostly find me here for the foreseeable future.
and the answer is, it’s NOT possible…… I weighed myself and I have gained three kilos, all in my BACKSIDE! Thus I am not a medical marvel worthy of being thoroughly probed and written about.
No, no, no, no, NO! Why gym, WHYYYyyy??? I’m wondering if some science bod, like the lovely Professor Brian Cox or maybe even Professor Stephen Hawking can help to explain the following. “How is it possible to weigh the same yet be wider in the ar*e area?” Is it something like this? Not. Happy.
Men have a propensity to lie (sometimes this is misguided niceness and preferential to ‘hurting’ someone with the truth, but most of the time it is not). If you eat all the tortilla, chorizo, fuet, cheese, millionaire’s shortbread and pan con tomate you put on weight. If you drink too much you get drunk (and […]
I signed up to Dry January to raise a few bob for Alcohol Concern and to see if I remembered what it was like not to drink. I used to do it voluntarily years ago, but then it got harder and harder as there was the ‘after Christmas’ reunion (wine obligatory), a birthday (cava obligatory), […]
I’m pretty sure there’s a very good reason I don’t have kids. Deep down my witchy senses tell me that the Universe had a large hand in saving some poor, unsuspecting little mites the pitying glances of other, more responsible and deserving adults, as mummy left them tethered outside the supermarket where the doggies should […]
The Secret Diary of Anne Pank 