Tag Archives: Single life

Queue shame = gym motivation

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That moment when you’re in the supermarket queue with your deliciously satisfying non-alcoholic beer, ‘Friday night is treat night’, large ham and mozzarella pizza (for one) and all the extra trimmings: salami, olives, cheese, mushrooms, etc. etc. because there’s just not quite enough lard on there and that MoFo ain’t gonna pimp itself, no siree; […]

Only time will tell…..

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…… but I’m beginning to think that alcohol is actually the glue that was holding this ol’ body together!! It’s almost ten days into Dry January and my face is falling off in great big lumps of dry skin (little flakey patches actually), and I’m more than a little certain that that extra three kilos […]

Wow! I’ve got an answer already

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and the answer is, it’s NOT possible……  I weighed myself and I have gained three kilos, all in my BACKSIDE! Thus I am not a medical marvel worthy of being thoroughly probed and written about.

How I feel about the gym

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No, no, no, no, NO!  Why gym, WHYYYyyy??? I’m wondering if some science bod, like the lovely Professor Brian Cox or maybe even Professor Stephen Hawking can help to explain the following.  “How is it possible to weigh the same yet be wider in the ar*e area?”  Is it something like this? Not. Happy.

Things I learnt in 2013

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Men have a propensity to lie (sometimes this is misguided niceness and preferential to ‘hurting’ someone with the truth, but most of the time it is not). If you eat all the tortilla, chorizo, fuet, cheese, millionaire’s shortbread and pan con tomate you put on weight. If you drink too much you get drunk (and […]

Kings Day PANK Duties

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In Cataluña they celebrate epiphany with Dia de Reyes or Kings Day.  Mrs L invited me to spend my first proper Kings Day with her and the family, which was lovely and now Aunty Anne is en route home after a day spent at Casa L’bonne, full of Mexican food and zero alcohol beer.  I arrived […]

Ikea + 1s

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There are certain things in life that you don’t like to do but that you must do.  IKEA on a Saturday afternoon in ANY country is one of these  things.  When you are a single woman, there are also certain things you must have that are essential to help you do the things that you must […]

Dry January – 3 days and counting

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I signed up to Dry January to raise a few bob for Alcohol Concern and to see if I remembered what it was like not to drink. I used to do it voluntarily years ago, but then it got harder and harder as there was the ‘after Christmas’ reunion (wine obligatory), a birthday (cava obligatory), […]